“As much as I would like to help you, I’m not in a position to offer you any assistance.”

“I’m sorry, <Name> I’d love to help out, but my calendar is booked that day.”

“Thank you for thinking of me for this project. Unfortunately, my team and I are at capacity and wouldn’t be able to start your project until the beginning of next year.”

See also:

• ‣
• How to apologize for something outside of your control
• How to set boundaries

Start Here

• CONGRATULATIONS, you legend, you! You know your boundaries, and you’re ready to express them.
• Depending on the request and who is asking, declining requests can come in all forms: email, text, phone, LinkedIn message, or carrier pigeon.
  • Reasonable requests deserve respectful refusals.
  • Requests from bosses and authority figures (even unreasonable ones) require a very careful, detailed, logic-based response.
  • Unreasonable requests are often not worth the dignity or time of a response.
• Not everyone deserves an explanation of why you can’t do something for them.
• If possible and appropriate, offer an alternative. Showing someone you’re making an effort to meet them halfway is a great goodwill builder.

Talking Points

• Hello <Name>, I’m terribly sorry, but I cannot do what you ask.
• I know you really want me to <describe what they want from you>.
• Unfortunately, I’m unable to do that because <a very high-level description of why you can’t do it. Unless this is a boss or client, in which case, be prepared to offer a more in-depth explanation>.
• What I can offer/ what I can do is <description of alternative>. How does that sound?

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